No. 33 — Discovering the "Diviner" within ft Teresa Brenneman
I’ve learned that Human Design, Parts Work, Astrology, Tarot, Shamanism, German New Medicine, Lithomancy, Myth Mending — absolutely EVERY tool works. What a relief! I don’t think it actually matters which tool or system you choose.
But which one will you connect with when expanding your Divination abilities? I always wonder how our deep senses come into play when it comes to practicing Divination.
Teresa Brenneman is my go-to Tarot Reader. I love that she reads my individual Human Design energy, and connects with her divination of choice to offer me insight. She’s a 2/4 MG, Shores Person, and a Nervous Eater. She has that ELUSIVE pair of fifth tones in her body. Double Feeling.
After a nudge from the Akashic Records from a spirit baby who has "orbited her for years" Teresa and I explore how parenting can become the ultimate deconditioning tool—forcing us to confront shadows we’ve ignored or hid from for decades… and at times unlock all new abilities.
Through a radical motherhood awakening and proving destiny often arrives unannounced, Teresa and I unravel the messy magic of self-discovery, divination, and awareness-building on the Playing Field of Life.
I like to invest in my physical and energy body with the help of a collection of practitioners once per season. Since I’m a seasonal creature and I work with others in intimate and vulnerable ways, it’s important to me to be tending and caring for my subtle bodies, so I can bring clear high-quality energy into the spaces I enter. I love a quarterly tarot check-in.
In this InSight, we discuss:
Human Design-Infused Tarot that honours individual authority
Spirit babies, Akashic Records, and divine timing
Children as mirrors: Raising "aware" kids in a chaotic world
What’s Teresa craving in her pregnancy as a Nervous Eater?
How Parts Work Alchemy transforms inner characters through somatic dialogue
Protecting the Mother through the child’s Origin Story/Creation process
Louise Hay & German New Medicine to contemplate the emotional roots of physical symptoms
Shamanic Self-Diagnosis x Parts Work – Channelling illnesses as messengers and entities
Celebrities as Modern Mythology, and the hidden cost of our collective projection
Here's Teresa’s Human Design Colour Palette:
TERESA BRENNEMAN
Design Type: 24 EMO MG
Palette: Touch / Shores / Personal / Desire
Find Teresa at:
Vaness Henry: 0:00
They're so helpless in the beginning and they do count on you entirely, and that is challenging.
Teresa Brenneman: 0:05
And they're little mirrors for you too, like I, I feel that way with my, with my parents. I know that I'm like showing them subconscious parts of themselves, even in my adulthood, and I trigger them in certain ways and I'm like, ooh, like this is a part of you that you don't like, and it's just. I don't know. I'm excited for that growth, as much as I'm sure my ego will resist it. I think there, when you have that awareness and you go into it with that of like, this little one's going to be such a mirror for me to work through my shit, you know it's exciting.
Vaness Henry: 0:41
It's Vaness Henry, you're listening to Insights, my private podcast, exclusively for community members like you. Here's my latest insight.
Vaness Henry: 0:58
I've got my friend Teresa Brenneman in the hot seat today. Hi Teresa, welcome to the show.
Teresa Brenneman: 1:05
Hi Vaness, thank you for having me.
Vaness Henry: 1:07
We were gabbing before, so I feel all giddy and giggly, but let me do a little introduction to you here.
Vaness Henry: 1:13
Teresa is a two four emotional manifesting generator. She's one of my favorite examples that talks about and teaches around the emotional experience, which is a totally lit up solar plexus Really cool. She's a shores person. She's also a nervous eater and she has this very potent double fifth tone in her body. So in her determination and in her environment, this is one of my favorite tones to study.
Vaness Henry: 1:37
I think it's the most elusive tone, the most misunderstood tone and, based on some of my work in health and shamanism and diagnosis, when people have a pair of fives they're the hardest to diagnose, they're the hardest to recognize. Is the adjustment, is the ailment in the lifestyle or is it in the diet? Because these people are so empathic, they really merge with other people as if it's happening to them and so how do you, how do you recognize, is this mine or is this theirs? And that's a journey and I think I'm raising an empathic child. I've got a feeling cognition child. So that's where my personal interest comes and I worked a lot with people with these double tones and they are some of the most tuned in people. They feel animals, they feel nature, they feel people.
Vaness Henry: 2:27
And so, teresa, the fact that you're also emotional authority. I'm like, okay, this is, we're going to get into it. So I've asked you on the show because you're my go-to tarot practitioner. I like to visit Teresa seasonally to do a little tarot spread and she also reads it through the lens of my design, which I really like. It's definitely like Karen Scholey's work in Reiki, doing Reiki on the nine energy centers. Teresa is really similar, like that and doing this fusion with her divination of choice, but applying it to somebody with awareness on a nine centered being.
Teresa Brenneman: 3:01
Love that.
Vaness Henry: 3:01
Teresa, that's why I go to you. Talk to me in that language. And recently Teresa has started the new School of Human Design with James Alexander. Yeah, so I'm going to want to hear about that. But I'm going to want to talk about tarot. We're going to want to talk about it all because you're shores, but this is all going to be filtered through. You're a highly sensitive, empathic person, and I'm really interested in hearing about what that's like.
Teresa Brenneman: 3:23
Ooh yeah, I'm excited to dive in.
Vaness Henry: 3:26
Yeah, really so welcome, welcome. How did you feel when I was doing the spiel on you.
Teresa Brenneman: 3:31
I mean, I'm a second line so I'm shy. Whenever I'm getting a lot of praise, I'm like, okay, thank you, yeah, okay.
Vaness Henry: 3:38
Sometimes I will go into these interviews. I've been doing a little bit of a podcast tour lately and I'll go into these interviews and they will like introduce me and I'm the way I am so embarrassed now. They're like welcome. I'm like like, is that what I sound like? Or they'll be like. This is how your works impacted me and the way my cheeks are hot, my ears are hot, I'm like I'm feeling that now I feel so shy and timid and then some people will be like you, don't come off as shy or embarrassed.
Vaness Henry: 4:06
I'm like, I'm not I. Just once I realize I can be perceived, it's like oh God, like I wear red.
Teresa Brenneman: 4:19
I'm loud, I get it, but it's like you can see me. Yeah, I mean it's the duality of being a second line shyness and boldness, like we can have this very bold energy, and then there's the shy aspect as well, and I think it's people don't know how to take it when they see both of those expressing I noticed that the second line, conscious or unconscious, has a really strong silliness.
Vaness Henry: 4:36
Yes, do you know we're like big kids. Yeah, yeah, you know like a real silly side and, and that's how I usually know, I'm like my body's comfortable.
Teresa Brenneman: 4:49
I'm in comfortable territory when I start to put on little voices probably like yeah, hi, Totally Just making songs out of everything, or giving people a nickname like hey girl, you know I will.
Vaness Henry: 4:58
Yeah, I will definitely do that, cause I'm kind of dropping into the energy. But then sometimes I will like I don't actually hear myself back in every space I go into anymore. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't, but if I've started to get, if it started to get really serious, I'm not always super interested in listening back, cause I'm I, I can go deep and I and I like to do that. But I like to lighten up as well, like I like the flexibility and the spaciousness of depth and height, you know. Me too.
Teresa Brenneman: 5:26
Yeah, I feel you on that one. Maybe it's a Shorzy thing, I don't know, maybe it is.
Vaness Henry: 5:30
So can you tell us a little bit about tarot as your divination tool? I think everyone is connected to a divination material. We kind of have these trial and error experiences. I think some people maybe know what they're drawn to right away. I do lithomancy, which is the casting of crystals Cool. So cast stones a certain way and we'll read them for someone. That's kind of my divination of choice. But I can read tarot, I can do augury, read birds in the sky, but you do have like a trusted one kind of thing and sometimes that changes at least it has for me in the past. But how did you start? Why is it tarot for you and how did you start to come to that?
Teresa Brenneman: 6:11
You know it happened. I would say, very naturally, that's the second line, but I did. I mean I did trial and error with some things. I did try the I Ching like the tossing of the coins and that, and it just felt too complicated for me. It felt like a lot of work. And then I actually had a friend of mine that was crashing with my husband and I for a bit and she's a 1-4. So she had, like really fluently learned tarot and like had a strong foundation in it, and she would pull cards every day, or we'd be talking about a conundrum and she'd be like, well, let's see what the cards have to say. And I just really appreciated having that kind of outside perspective to get us out of our minds.
Teresa Brenneman: 6:46
And then we started having this morning routine where we'd sit there and pull cards together and like compare our readings, and it was really fun and she just started teaching me what she knew and I just started doing it and this was during, I think, 2020, 2021. And then I was starting to kind of have a TikTok presence. I had just kind of started that up for fun and I started seeing tarot readers live streaming and I was like, oh, that'd be like a really good way to get some practice in to just get on the live stream and pull cards for people.
Teresa Brenneman: 7:14
So I started doing that and then was pretty shocked at how good I was at it and people started booking sessions with me for tarot. And I didn't even go into it thinking I can make any money. I was just like I truly have fun doing this and maybe people will enjoy, and I would do it in my DMs on Instagram too. I'd be like hey, I have you know an hour. Who wants like a reading in my for your community fourth line shit? Yeah for sure. And so some of my friends started buying readings from me at that point and it just kind of spiraled. And then I started realizing through doing DM readings that I was just naturally incorporating people's designs, cause if I knew, their design already.
Teresa Brenneman: 7:49
I'd be like, oh, and because of this and that, and I'm seeing it through this lens of your design. And so even on my live stream readings, I started being like give me your birth information too, if you want, and I can incorporate this. And so it was very experimental, but it just again, it felt very natural just to include human design. I'm like, why wouldn't I? That's so important, if I'm. I also thought of it from the lens of I don't want to be conditioning them in a way that is not correct for them. You know cause tarot can kind of center around making decisions, even though I never liked to.
Vaness Henry: 8:19
I don't feel that you position it that way. Yeah, no, yeah.
Teresa Brenneman: 8:21
It can. It can give data around making decisions, and so I like to just affirm their authority. If I'm doing that, like you know, listen to your gut, or you know, ride your wave or whatever just to really take that home for them.
Vaness Henry: 8:35
As somebody who participates in divination, once I learned I was an ego manifester, I did feel like, ooh, I need to be more careful with my divination because now, if I say this, someone could really take that as like. This may be a little too much ego, but, like gospel, like they could take it as like, and it's like I'm really meaning it, it's coming from my heart, so it's going to come, it's going to sound that way, but also always run that through your system and and and you know so as somebody who is a participant in divination tools, as somebody who also uses them, there is a responsibility to listen to what the diviner is saying, because you know that they don't see you in that way, but they're seeing something, so can you listen to it and and and hear the story that you need in it. That's why, like, multiple could listen. Multiple people could listen to a reading and they could receive the message that they need from it. You know, you see, I love people do readings online and like, for the first place.
Vaness Henry: 9:38
The first place I experienced that was an app called Periscope. Have you ever heard of that? I remember that app. Oh, people go live all over the world. I found some lady in Hawaii. I was like, love this, and she was doing readings like that and she would do, like wheel of fortune, I'm going to pick you and do a reading. And I was like, pick me, pick me. Never got chosen.
Teresa Brenneman: 9:55
Never got chosen.
Vaness Henry: 9:56
Made friends with her instead. Yeah.
Teresa Brenneman: 9:58
Made friends with her instead you would.
Vaness Henry: 10:00
I was like you're cool, I know, um, but as somebody who will now go invest in it, it's, they're not giving me gospel, but they are reading some type of plane. Yeah, and it is up to me to filter that through my system to see what I need, because I could actually do the divination myself.
Teresa Brenneman: 10:18
A hundred percent.
Vaness Henry: 10:19
But for me I find it is not as impactful. I love to pull cards for myself, but there is so much value in when I listen to someone transcribe their own chart or their own body graph or their own natal chart. They are so incredibly biased when they do that that tells me I'm incredibly biased when I translate mine. So if I and I'm very selective about the mirrors, I will choose to look in when I'm navigating the playing field of life. You know who's. If you're going to show me some ugly bits like I don't know that I want to be looking in there. I realize I have those in there. I want to look at some other things, yeah, but but no, like. Sometimes.
Vaness Henry: 10:56
I say that in that kind of coy way because sometimes I have felt projected upon or turned. I did not feel seen and I did feel misunderstood or not recognized, and it's not a good feeling. And I want to see myself when I look in the mirror, you know. And so when I whether it's my dearest friends and inner circle or the people who I invest to take care of my energy I'm very careful about the selection and what's going to be shown because, again, I could do it myself, but there's certain biases I have. I'm just not going to see. So how is what's that mirror going to reflect? And then it's up to me to look at it, like it's up to me to look at the message. It's not that my, my diviner is. That's a weird word coming out. Don't know where that's coming.
Teresa Brenneman: 11:39
I know I never heard that word.
Vaness Henry: 11:40
I like it, though I don't know where it's coming from. Um, I, I, I'm narrating around the experience, I'm not sure, but there's like a queer end and then there's like a diviner, I guess, but that that person is. I guess that person is seeing something, but you want to hear it for what it is, like you, there, there, what, what. What I'm drawn to about your work is that you are painting the environment, or perhaps painting the opportunities or the things to be aware of. Let's bring this to the surface here, the themes going on. So it's helping me see the playing field. It's helping me see what do I want to do here, cause these are the energies at play. For me, it feels like it helped. It helps give me missing information to empower me to make the choice for myself. Some readers are going to have a bias and they're going to try and guide you and you should listen to that, because they are seeing something but you're always
Teresa Brenneman: 12:28
running it through your system, you know similar to like flipping a coin, like I remember my dad always taught me flip a coin because that'll show you how you really feel. And that's kind of how I look at diviners. I love that word. It's like if they're showing me, if they're saying, no, you should actually do this, and I'm like, uh-uh, I don't, actually don't want to do that.
Vaness Henry: 12:45
It helps me make the decision.
Teresa Brenneman: 12:47
Exactly so. I really like to highlight that in my readings is I'm just giving you the data. Please make these decisions for yourself. These are the opportunities for you to make decisions around. These are the choice points. You'll know what's correct for you, you know, and really be empowering in that way, and I like to provide a lot of context. That is feedback I've gotten a lot is you just helped me fill in the gaps and provided context for things that kind of already were going on. And then it also I feel like as a second line I don't know if you feel this way it feels like my duty to kind of bridge spirituality for people. There's some spiritual, divine connection. You're innately spiritual yeah, that, second lines and that feels like a gift from source God, god, spirit, whatever you want to call it and that feels like my, it's like my calling to bridge that for people and if I have that opportunity, I'm going to take it.
Vaness Henry: 13:36
Something that I love about generators I worship the same girl.
Teresa Brenneman: 13:40
Okay, I love about generators.
Vaness Henry: 13:41
We do this in my family too, too. Like sometimes my boys will ask me for input, let's say, on an outfit we're very fashioning, like we, I guess I'm wearing a sweatsuit but my boys are very like.
Teresa Brenneman: 13:52
I get that vibe from your family. I can. You're all about the aesthetic. That's why I. That's why I love consuming your content and getting clothes.
Vaness Henry: 14:00
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah we we and we're all ego beings in my house. So we, we do we are luxury adoring. Yeah, luxury, anyway, what was I going to say about this? Oh, right so sometimes, um, they'll want my input on something and I'll be like, yeah, okay, I like that one, pick that one. And then there'll be the like disappointed.
Teresa Brenneman: 14:19
It's like great.
Vaness Henry: 14:19
Now you know you want that one, so pick that one Okay. And they just make their little sounds yeah, and so it is so valuable to like you. It is like flipping a coin. You know how you feel about it, cause I just made the call for you and you were like oh, so you actually were confused. You know what you wanted. You just needed a little, just a little tap, just a little tap no-transcript.
Vaness Henry: 14:51
Definitely come up now we're, we're at 10 years old, totally different energy tween, very aware, very smart. Smart at this point really by age seven. Yeah, kids are like. I noticed a huge flip at seven eight.
Vaness Henry: 15:13
I have an 11 year old niece and it's been crazy watching her come into this phase of her life. Let's say she's a manifestor, by the way. But let's segue, because recently you have had some very exciting news, which is you've announced to your community that you're expecting yeah. Which is you've announced to your community that you're expecting yeah, okay, can we have a moment around this? Because you have shared with me. It's not that I wasn't open to having kids, it just wasn't happening. And so this is kind of a surprise. What girl? What happened?
Teresa Brenneman: 15:37
Okay, so my husband and I, in 2020, we had this you know the big talk around it and we both came to the conclusion yes, this is something that we want. Maybe the timing's not perfect, but, like whatever, let's just kind of start vaguely trying, you know, not in a very organized fashion, but just not preventing, like a code for like let's have a bunch of sex unprotected, yeah.
Teresa Brenneman: 15:59
Let's just basically that was it, that was our conversation. We're like let's just see what happens. A fun time, yeah, yeah, so great, great times. But you know, I had kind of gone back and forth for a long time. Him and I have known each other since we were 13. He is a 3740, a 2145. He has always wanted family. He's very tribal and a 659. So he's very tribal. He's always known like since we were probably 19 years old, I've heard him say I want marriage and I want kids and I want it to be with you. He's known what he wanted for a long time.
Vaness Henry: 16:31
This is the most two-four story by the way. Oh yeah, he's been calling me out.
Teresa Brenneman: 16:35
By the way, even how we met. We went to the same middle school but we were on different teams. We had like teams in our middle school and his friend I was a new girl, I didn't know anybody, but his friend came up to me and said have you heard of Thomas Brenneman? Cause he thinks you're really cute and I'm like I have no idea who that is.
Vaness Henry: 16:49
I'm sorry, tom, I didn't realize names were Thomas and Teresa. Yes, oh, give them a show. Give them a show, oh my.
Teresa Brenneman: 16:56
God, his family, calls us Tomisa. Tomisa, I love that. Are you going to do a little T name? Are you going to do a little T name?
Vaness Henry: 17:10
I don't know, everybody's saying we should, but I'm like I don't know, I don't know about that. One Can't wait to see what you do. Your baby already has a name and we will simply discover it Exactly.
Teresa Brenneman: 17:16
We'll just figure it out through signs and whatever. But yeah, so I very much got called out from him when we were like 13. And then, um, yeah, it just I. I was always back and forth and he did say it was more important for him to be with me than to have a family, and so he ultimately chose to marry me knowing that they're romantic.
Teresa Brenneman: 17:34
I know he's such, he's such a romantic. I don't know what I did to deserve it, but he got. He's very sweet and he had said even though that's something that I want, I've thought about it a lot and I'd I'd rather share my life with you and if that's something you decide, you don't want, that's okay.
Vaness Henry: 17:48
Every time you say it, I die a little bit, I'm like oh, I know, I know, I know Um so honky laugh as I. Yeah, oh, love that, love a love story.
Teresa Brenneman: 17:58
I'm just gushing over here. I mean I'm a 12, 22, so I am I am a romantic, for sure and a 39 55. I got that whole stream. I've only got the 22.
Vaness Henry: 18:07
There, that's my only little activation, unconscious Hi, maybe some grace.
Teresa Brenneman: 18:11
I'm just reaching, I'm just reaching for some love. Yeah, I will just overwhelm your 22 with my entire stream. I love, I do I, you know.
Vaness Henry: 18:18
I do, I'd love to watch you, I'd love to take you in. I love when you start going off on a vibe and an emotion, and I didn't realize these double feeling too. I'm like, oh, she's, she's very powerful. Um, I knew my husband at 13 as well. Shut up, yeah, and I read something once that like a very big amount, like a higher than you think percentage of people have already met their long-term partner by the time they're 16.
Teresa Brenneman: 18:41
Okay, I did hear something called like the red string theory or something. I've seen like these pictures or videos of people that are like oh, I was at Disneyland with my family and my husband is in the picture behind us but, we didn't meet for 20 years later, or whatever. It's that, shit's crazy.
Vaness Henry: 18:55
My husband is always orbiting me. Yeah, it's really weird, like, but like we were not. We went to the same high school, so we in neighboring towns but there was one high school okay, and um, he dated my friend like I didn't look at him, thomas dated my friend for a while too okay, we're both six twos, so we're both like clueless, you know. And then bumped into, oh, bumped into each other, as we were both going on the roof, as we both like 10 years later always were, but pals always were connected.
Vaness Henry: 19:22
Yeah, but the only time get this fuck the only time we were separated, he moved away and he was in another province. That's when I had cancer. So he was. We worked at the same mall and didn't know. We lived across the street and didn't know, always was there, and then the one time we were distanced between us, your boy over here was dying so I was like you might, the cosmos, the powers that be.
Vaness Henry: 19:47
we're like we need to get him back. We need to get, we need to bump these. They need to figure it out these two, cause they're never gonna. They're just clueless nannies, you know just.
Teresa Brenneman: 19:54
Yeah, yeah, I mean that's. I had to be whacked over the head, yeah.
Vaness Henry: 19:58
Me too.
Teresa Brenneman: 19:59
Me too, you know it was like I, we, we dated around in our twenties, like we dated for a couple of years after high school and then dated around in our twenties. I was, I was dating fuck boys. You know I was going through that phase of like.
Teresa Brenneman: 20:12
I want the fuck boy, I want the bad boy. Um, because I think I knew, I think in my heart of hearts I knew that Thomas was my person and I wanted to like get that curious exploratory energy out of my system and because I knew I was going to come back to him if he was still available. You know, and that's kind of what ended up happening, like he did his whole three, six bonds made and broken with a lot of different people, and then, you know, he really did the apps and kind of dated around where I dated all my friends, and then we ended up. You know, it was kind of one of those crossroads where it's like you either want to be with me or not, so don't, kind of cause we were still friends, but he was still in love with me and I was just trying to figure out what I was doing.
Teresa Brenneman: 20:53
So you know, my fickle 39, 55, it was just back and forth and back and forth and he kind of gave me an ultimatum and was like you either want to be with me or not, like cut me loose if not. And I was like, okay, yep, and so when we were 27, we got married and yeah, like I really was kind of upping the air with the kids thing. I was like I could take it or leave it like for the longest time that was. I think that's very normal, especially in this day and age.
Teresa Brenneman: 21:16
You know cause it's like the world's strange don't know how people have kids in their twenties.
Vaness Henry: 21:23
It's absolutely true. It's absolutely true. Yeah, I'm still. I think I'm still that way now.
Teresa Brenneman: 21:28
Yeah, totally, I'm like, I'm barely feeling like a half an adult, you know, and so it just was one of those things. And then, once we had the discussion, I actually the thing was is I had an Akashic records reading with a good friend of mine.
Teresa Brenneman: 21:40
Well, she's become a good friend and shout her out. Her name is Tegan Parkey. She's amazing Well, tegan Parkinson, but yeah, her Instagram is Tegan Parkey, great Akasha records reader. But she, listen, I booked this reading thinking I was going to go and talking about career and like all these exciting things happening. First question she asked when she opens my records is you want to have a baby? Yeah, and I'm like what? Like totally taken off guard. And she's like well, it's in your records.
Teresa Brenneman: 22:08
And, vanessa, every single psychic slash shaman that I've worked with has said you have a spirit baby hanging out with you, just waiting for the right time to come in. And I was always like really, I don't know about that, you can tell them to like kick rocks right now. And they're like well, they're just waiting for you to be ready. So that really opened the door to have the conversation with my husband and say, listen, I know you've always wanted a kid. I think I'm finally ready.
Teresa Brenneman: 22:32
And the emotion that came over me when Tegan brought this up was just, it was something I'd never felt before and she was like I think you're having a response to this. It feels like you do want this. And I was like you're right, I do and I'm terrified and I do want it. And so you know, that was kind of the first initial conversation. And then I did work with another psychic at some point around that time, maybe like a year before, and I had said, um, you know what is? Do you see anything for me around kids? And she was like just don't rush it, you don't need to rush it, like it'll. If it's meant to happen, it'll come. But she, she was also an astrologer and I think looking at my chart and was just kind of like it doesn't fusion.
Teresa Brenneman: 23:15
Yeah, and I really felt relieved in that. And then, yeah, it took five years for us to conceive. So I really it's like you could say, yeah, that's infertility or whatever, but I just feel like babies have their own timing. Yeah, I think that's a very interesting conversation. Yes, I yeah, and this baby, I think, has been orbiting me for a long time. I also worked with a naturopath to just help me with some like menstrual issues when I was maybe 30.
Teresa Brenneman: 23:41
And, ironically enough, she was like a spirit baby reader and I didn't know that when I signed up to work with her, of course, she was a spirit baby reader Right and she was like I don't talk to all my patients about this, but like you just seem like you'd be open, like you have a spirit baby with you and I'm just like, of course, like this baby is just trying to get my attention. So it really did feel like it was orbiting for a while and it was just waiting for me to like, come online and be ready.
Vaness Henry: 24:07
I know I present very spiritual and la-di-da. I don't know what I think about anything Like. I'm really just here learning. I can't prove anything, I don't know anything. Same girl I found out I was pregnant because I had a tarot reading. It's exact Like I. I was infertile. For my treatment I was told, you know, when I was going through treatment, do you want to freeze your eggs? Because you know this is incredibly damaging to the reproductive. You're going to have direct radiation to here and we weren't financially in a position to do that. And so my mom I can see now looking back must've had a fucking time with that, you know. But I was like I'm 17 at this point, like I, I don't know.
Teresa Brenneman: 24:46
I'm not thinking about that Like okay, you know.
Vaness Henry: 24:48
And so I kind of was baked into me. I remember thinking about this while like the radiation machine was on me. It's like it's taking away my ability to do that. It was like wild. And so I kind of like lived in the reality that that was so. And so when I was with a girlfriend who was like in a spot and she was like let's go have some tarot readings, I was like, love it, let's go, we'll go shopping, we'll get stones, we'll do whatever. She was starting up a crystal business. Actually she was like going to like sell these little curated stones and whatever. So she was like getting inspiration. So we go, I have this reading from this little like barefooted Hobbit man like with like long ass hair, long beard, like the caricature that you would think. And so she goes and has her reading first Cause I'm just kind of there to support her. She comes back and I go in, I sit down and he crosses his legs and he's like um, are you planning to have a child, or something like that? And I was like no.
Teresa Brenneman: 25:43
I was like this is going to be great. You know what I?
Vaness Henry: 25:45
mean he's like well, I see one coming. And I was like, oh yeah, like, cause I know I'm not fertile. So I'm like oh yeah, when do you see it? And he looks me dead in the eye. He's like in nine months. And I was like so I'm pregnant right now. And he's like yes, you are. I think I laughed and I was like well, this is what's going on in my career. Like I was, you know, I was moving up in finance. I was like whatever dude.
Vaness Henry: 26:09
Yeah and um, he rattled me like and so I come out to my girlfriend and she's like well, go buy a fucking pregnancy test. So I'm like I go to the grocery store to buy a pregnancy test. I have there happens to be all these people from my high school who I like, oh yeah, that's what I wanted to say to you. There was something about like dating my husband. Like I wasn't looking at him Cause I like came from a very, very small French town and I was not interested in being there. I wanted to get away, I wanted to go do my things, I, and so I was not like going to fall in love with someone from there. You know jokes on me, but you know I was out looking like dating college guys and you know, and then dare was like, hey, I want to go for coffee. And my own hubris.
Vaness Henry: 26:54
I knew his mom had just passed away and at that time I was doing a lot of. I was doing a lot of motivational speaking with the Canadian cancer society, cause it was like it was like springtime and that's like cancer awareness time. So I was like on TV, like doing like the doing the circuit. You know, yeah, he invites me for fucking coffee. And I'm like, oh, he's going to want to talk about his dead mom, like, uh, oh, ego, stupid girl, though, and he was like no man. I just like, I'm like, how are you? Like, what's going on? Like just want to connect, so embarrassing. Then then we fell in love. And then we fell in love and then I um, find out, I'm pregnant. Anyways, I get this, I get this test. There's these people I'm trying to hide this pregnancy test. I'm like, what am I?
Teresa Brenneman: 27:35
I'm not embarrassed, embarrassed like I'm, just there's so much emotions going yeah.
Vaness Henry: 27:39
I go home, pee on it, it lights up pregnant and I'm in the bathroom and I'm like, uh oh, I don't know what to do. Uh, I don't know what to do. I've been with this guy for a year and a half. We live together, though I I think I love him. Like I'm not sure of anything at that point, like I'm like yeah so so I'm like, okay, so it's I.
Vaness Henry: 28:00
It took me like 10 minutes like psych me out, psych me up to get out of the bathroom. And he was watching football wearing a Jersey and he's like, yeah, like at the TV, and I was like, oh God, is this the guy I'm going to have? Look at him barking at the TV and he's laughing. And he just turns and looks at me up the hallway and he looked he's feeling, caves feeling. And he just goes. He's like what's wrong? I'm like nothing, why, why would you think anything was wrong? He's like you're pregnant. I was like it's fine, it's fine, come here, come here, come here. And I was like, oh, breakdown, breakdown. Didn't choose it. Now I'm like this is the best thing that has ever happened to me. This is the funnest occupation I could ever have. But I have one child, so I can't speak with people with multiple children and are just like doing that journey Cause that's not for me.
Teresa Brenneman: 28:51
That seems so hard. I mean, yeah, we're one and done. I'm like that's all buddy, Especially after the first trimester. I'm like I never want to go through that shit again.
Vaness Henry: 29:00
I found the first trimester very hard. The second one was wonderful.
Teresa Brenneman: 29:05
I was sexy.
Vaness Henry: 29:06
I was the Empress energy. I was empowered. I started to get tired. I did start to get tired at the third trimester.
Teresa Brenneman: 29:13
That's going to happen. I'm fully expecting that. I mean luckily, cause I'm 35. So I have so many friends that have had kids already. Everybody's been very sweet about preparing me, but not but saying you know everyone's different. It might not be this way, but so far it's been pretty par for the course. What what everybody else's experiences have been like, for the most part, other than people who have had outlying experiences.
Vaness Henry: 29:34
But but girl the game is about to change. The playing field has shifted. I, I was just, I just did a little chit chat with erin claire jones. Something that she said backed me. She's like you said something that had impacted me. I was like, oh fuck, here we go, what could this possibly be? And she was lovely, though, she was absolutely lovely. She was like you said if you're not a parent, we're not playing the same game. So I'm not even watching you, kind of like from that lens. And she's like, now that I'm doing my same job, but I do it on no sleep. She's like do I really understand? Like what you were even talking about? And she's like it is a different game. You do have to work differently. You do everything shifts. And she's like and also I'm like passionate, yes, I can feel you have something outside you.
Teresa Brenneman: 30:18
Yes, I can feel that shift happening already. Where it's like, you are more. I mean my mom's always talked about the maiden to mother to.
Vaness Henry: 30:27
I can't remember the other one.
Teresa Brenneman: 30:28
Crone, I think there's one in the middle of that too, like after motherhood Maybe I'm wrong, I don't know but that transition that happens and I was always like I guess I'm going to be in my maidenhood forever.
Teresa Brenneman: 30:41
But now that I'm feeling that transition, I'm like holy shit, there is something to this, oh yeah, like it just feels like my life is not for me anymore and not in a bad way, but it's like there wasn't as much at stake before, there wasn't as much to I don't know.
Teresa Brenneman: 30:58
It was just kind of like la la la, I'm doing this all because it's fun, and now it feels like there's more for me to pour into and it just feels like a big transition to go through in my maturity and my overall personal evolution as well. So I'll be curious to see how it shifts for my husband as well, because I hear that men have it more towards the end of the pregnancy and towards when the baby actually comes, like they actually have a hormonal shift that takes place. And it's weird when, when you're the pregnant one, because you kind of do feel like you're in it alone and he's still kind of just living his life and unaffected, other than being concerned about me feeling good, but I can see that he's going to have a big shift later and like I'm kind of starting that transition now.
Vaness Henry: 31:43
So all the way. I'm like can we bring this back to the fifth tone for a second? Husbands, dads, partners, who are not the one carrying the child but, let's say, are feeling cognition. My husband is feeling cognition, absolutely, going through the pregnancy with you, absolutely Feeling the symptoms with you may likely, will likely put on weight with you.
Teresa Brenneman: 32:08
He felt the symptoms.
Teresa Brenneman: 32:10
Absolutely, that's real. I had to like I have like some of the pregnancy books and I was just casually reading one and this was like a day or two after him and I were talking about it and he was like I'm feeling nauseous and he is a hard sleeper Like he, our entire relationship. He's a corpse. Like he'll be dead to the world. He has been waking up in the middle of the night. The first time I noticed it too.
Teresa Brenneman: 32:29
Um, so we worked together at a bar on the weekends and he will go his entire shift without peeing and I saw him go to the bathroom and I was like wait a minute. You like never go pee when you're at work. He's like I've peed twice already and I'm like you are getting symptoms from me, like he's like I'm waking up in the night. I'm peeing. Multiple times during my shift he was feeling nauseous. A couple of times he's had headaches. Like anytime I'm having like a new symptom. Like a couple of days later he starts having it. He's also an undefined spleen, so I think it's another added layer.
Vaness Henry: 33:01
You're deeply braided Like this is a sign of like a deep braid of love, because this person cares about you, is so tuned into you that he's able to sensorially experience it. That's what I'm saying. This is this is like so evolved that we talk about things like yes, sometimes dads get like no, it's really like, really like some of us energetically yeah are attuned to actually do that, and this happens to be one of the most elusive tones that is able to do that in a wild way.
Vaness Henry: 33:27
As soon as, as soon as that baby's born, he's also gonna be able to weave in. So are you and plug in and feel everything that baby's feeling? Yeah? Man yeah this baby's gonna be a feeling baby somewhere, somewhere it's's going to show up Somewhere it's got to be, I mean there's already.
Teresa Brenneman: 33:41
I mean I don't know, of course, because it might not, they might not be born on the due date, but you never know yeah. Yeah, If they are born even within the vicinity of the due date, they're going to be a Scorpio and I'm a Scorpio moon and my friend who does Vedic astrology was already looking at like potential charts and was like you have so much karma with this child, and so I just think there's going to be other threads as well and it'll be really fascinating to see that play out.
Vaness Henry: 34:06
It is such a shamanic experience to give birth because your essence is literally splitting in two. And there is now something that has a part of you that you've grown, that holds your cellular DNA. You share brain cells with this child. You know it will now exist outside of you, and so you've come undone. You've been made, you've been unmade and remade. You know, put back together and something now exists outside you and you've created that. You've become creator. You know you're in that realm. Now, girl, I felt like Beyonce.
Teresa Brenneman: 34:42
When I, as my kid, came out, I was like whoa wow, we like you made me feel so much better about being pregnant, Vanessa. Cause, when I told you about it, I was still kind of like holy shit, I'm pregnant. I was still in that shock phase of it. And you, I've told my husband I'm like Vanessa. She felt like Beyonce.
Vaness Henry: 34:58
Beyonce, cause you know what it's like. There is incredible hormones, incredible surging power, some really magnetic, divine feminine things going on in the body and for me, the labor experience was the most empowering part which you know. That's usually the most traumatic part that you would, you know, classically hear about, but I went into a zone there and just when he came out, I never felt so thin. Oh, I felt thin I was like oh you know, and then I, then I, I remember, like once the placenta came out after then I was like nevermind.
Vaness Henry: 35:38
I felt like I survived this thing, this like splitting into. I didn't die. My body somehow knew how to grow ears and a brain and like Whoa, you know, and there's my husband like your body didn't know how to do that, how the hell did it know to do that? You are Beyonce and I was like I know.
Teresa Brenneman: 35:56
Can you believe this?
Vaness Henry: 35:59
All of us gassing each other up all the time and, yeah, it's just been like there's been no accountability teacher for me than the child. Like, the child is the ultimate teacher. It's such the irony of how we understand life, because they're so helpless in the beginning and they do count on you entirely, and that is challenging.
Teresa Brenneman: 36:18
And they're little mirrors for you too, Like I. I feel that way with my, with my parents. I know that I'm like showing them subconscious parts of themselves, even in my adulthood, and I trigger them in certain ways and I'm like, Ooh, like this is a part of you that you don't like. And it's just I I don't know. I'm excited for that growth, as much as I'm sure my ego will resist it. I think there, when you have that awareness and you go into it with that of like, this little one's going to be such a mirror for me to work through my shit, you know.
Vaness Henry: 36:50
Yeah, it's exciting. So you are now tasked with like the job. Like the job, which is, like you know, bold statement. Bold statement here You're now tasked with true human design, because human design is really for kids.
Teresa Brenneman: 37:07
I've been saying that, vanessa, I feel like this is my ultimate assignment. It's like the universe. Oh, you want to have a human design school. You want to teach human design.
Vaness Henry: 37:15
We fucking lost her. She went on the roof. She was the kid expert and then she was like I got to have kids and now she's up there having kids and I'm just like when is this bitch going to come?
Vaness Henry: 37:23
down, she's going to come back and tell us what she's learning, but she's not. She's in her world and I'm just kind of watching that play out. But you do. You have all this knowledge and now you're going to, you're going to be aware and raise an aware kid, you're. You're going to do your best not listen to her. Hey, listen to this fucking mantra coming out here. You're going to do your best not to put that shit on them and see them for who they are, not a narcissistic extension of you just because you created them. A thousand percent. You're going to discover the person in there, the spirit in there, and you're going to do your best to nourish it in an aware way for this new world that we're in. We're a part of a cool generation. Our parents didn't necessarily have access in that way and they were working with different tools. They did their best, but they also put stuff on us.
Vaness Henry: 38:08
They didn't know they were putting stuff on because their parents did that. And now we're just we're stopping that cycle Absolutely and we're, you know, looking in the mirror now and going, oh, oh, my parents did that. Like that's another thing that really happened for me. Once I became a parent, I really started to understand and forgive my parents because I was no longer the child and looking at them through the child lens, suddenly it was like, oh God, I understand my mom way more now I already am.
Teresa Brenneman: 38:35
I'm already developing so much empathy. Just, I think, during each phase of the pregnancy I'm remembering where my mom was at and, of course, this is rehashing stuff for her. So she's telling me what she experienced in her first trimester, with me and with my brother, and I'm like, fascinating, putting myself in her shoes. That's your origin story, yeah, and I'm like, wow, this is your baby's origin story.
Vaness Henry: 38:56
Right now, what's going on in your world? The mother should be treated as absolutely sacred because she is also giving birth to her child's origin story. You're also double feeling. Whatever you're pulling into your environment, you're baking into baby. You got to be adored, loved, cherished, protected, celebrated. You know what I mean.
Teresa Brenneman: 39:16
I'm surrounded by 2145s for a reason. James said yesterday he's like you're like B, like beast of honey, with these 2145s. Hopefully we all treat you like a queen and you all. You feel like a queen around us and I'm like I really do. I feel so blessed to have so many 2145s in my corner, just like gassing me up and just treating me so well and, yeah, making me feel like royalty. So I feel like I am being cherished and I seen as a sacred creature during this time and it feels really good.
Teresa Brenneman: 39:45
I and you know what this pregnancy has shown me is like, how much support I have, and this is what.
Vaness Henry: 39:51
Tegan told me.
Teresa Brenneman: 39:55
She was like everybody loves babies. You're going to be surprised who comes out of the woodworks just to support you and your network Might be people you haven't spoken to in years. I've been talking to people from high school that I haven't talked to in years that are like wanting to know what the pregnancy is like and wanting to share with me with their situation and it feels so good yeah.
Teresa Brenneman: 40:08
It really is like. It just really shows me how much people actually do care about this and it's really beautiful. It's been such like such a beautiful experience actually so far. I feel so grateful. I love that.
Vaness Henry: 40:20
I think I think I didn't really fully realize the specialness when I was, you know, gestating, like I was very resistant to the experience because I was, so I didn't choose it, I was so shocked this was happening to me, you know, and going, definitely going on the roof, having my Saturn return, breaking up with what I knew as my normal, um, I didn't think it would kind of lead, I guess, where we are now. I didn't think it would kind of lead here where we would never do. But, um, yeah, it really has been like a pretty wild journey girl, like I don't know where I would have gone, like, like what was I thinking I would do before? I don't even know. It's like, but again, I've been doing it for a decade now. So it's like this is just who you are and I was. This has been a third of my life, like, yeah, this is all.
Teresa Brenneman: 41:08
Yeah, I think it is different with the. You know I've had friends that have had most of my friends had kids in their twenties and so being this 35 year old and like, yeah, actually living most of my life without that, you know it's, I've gotten really used to that life and in that rhythm. And my husband and I have been married for almost eight years now and we've really had a lot of time to come together as partners and but it's been so night we're both emotional, so it's been like slow and at our pace and it's like we just got a joint bank account last year.
Teresa Brenneman: 41:39
You know, it's like we're finally kind of coming together as a family and then the baby can't. You know, it's almost like we had to kind of cross all these T's and dot these I's and we actually did have time to get prepared for this in a way, whereas a lot of people don't. And you know there's, I know people always say there's never the correct timing or the best timing to have a child. It's like you always want to be more prepared than you are. But I feel like, truly, I'm like I feel so lucky that we've been able to do a lot of deep emotional work. I think it's amazing to bring children into prepared spaces.
Vaness Henry: 42:08
You know we see studies on this in the queer community a lot, because the queer community has to work harder to, let's say, have a child and so they have to be in a stronger financial position. They had to be in a strong. You know, there's certain parameters they have to go through to be able to do that and statistically now we're seeing is these are more loved children because they're wanted. There's, there's space for them. They've been, they've been. You know it's never an accident. Yeah, I think it's. It's always very intentional. Right, there's lots to learn there, but I, I, I didn't. I think I did.
Vaness Henry: 42:38
What I see through you is I didn't realize the sacred specialness of my pregnancy during the gestation period, and I do now feel that mothers need to be so worship protected in that timeframe. And you happen to be a nervous eater she's eating vibes through the atmosphere. What are you doing to take care of yourself extra at this time? You know cause you're going to have. You have a really evolved way of experiencing nourishment, so, like, what are you doing to be nourishing?
Teresa Brenneman: 43:04
You know, um, like food wise, at least, that was kind of difficult up until now, but I have noticed, noticed, um, I'm reaching for things that I liked as a kid. Like I'm nostalgic I've been a nostalgic eater for the last couple months um, but also a lot of fruit, a lot of like water, heavy fruit, like watermelon berries, um mangoes, stuff like that, um a lot of salt as well, really, into the salt, I think. I think in the.
Vaness Henry: 43:31
Sims. I think in the Sims sorry, sorry Throwback is my favorite game growing up Still my favorite game. I loved the Sims. You feed the pregnant person a bunch of watermelon If you want them to have a girl or something. These weird little chat things. Oh my God, that's hilarious. But as an as a nervous eater, what about? And you, you said, you know, I'm noticing I'm eating nostalgia juiciness. Is there any shows, then, that you've been like, where are the nostalgic juicy shows you've been watching?
Teresa Brenneman: 43:57
Ooh, um, not not so much nostalgic, but you know what show I'm obsessed with right now I've been binge watching is couples therapy. Have you heard of this show?
Vaness Henry: 44:05
No.
Teresa Brenneman: 44:05
What is this? Sounds like I'm. Sounds like I'd be so into it.
Vaness Henry: 44:08
What is?
Teresa Brenneman: 44:09
it. You would. You would love the show. You know, nick Strack and I were even saying we could see Vanessa doing a show like this but with human design, because I was like I wish I knew these people's human design.
Teresa Brenneman: 44:20
So the whole premise of the show is I think there's like five or six seasons Now they follow a therapist doing couples therapy in real time, in real life, and then they also follow the couples into their homes and so you get to see them like in the nitty gritty of the therapy. And then you also get to see the therapist go talk to her mentor about the sessions and have her own shit come up. It is such a good show If you're like into personal development or any of this stuff. I'm learning about myself. I keep going to.
Teresa Brenneman: 44:49
Thomas and being like, oh my God, I've been projecting on you and like, I'm, like, I'm like watching this show. But like I was like this would be the perfect show if we knew their human designs. And Nick and I were both like envisioning. You were like that'd be a lot of work, but we'll just fantasize. And then maybe Vanessa will just get our download. Girl want that.
Vaness Henry: 45:07
The reflector community came hard at me a few years ago about doing hdirl dating. They're like we want that oh my god, I was like do, do, do another season of hdirl, but do it from the perspective of dating then. Then people were like do it from this perspective of parenting. I was like I'm you're never about to show kids like that. I'm not gonna do that yeah, but and then?
Vaness Henry: 45:27
people do, but no, your work. So there was all of a sudden, all I did, this one little weird thing. It was like I'm going to film. Hey, you guys, I like you, I think your muses of mine, you're beautiful, let me make art with you.
Teresa Brenneman: 45:37
You know, that's what that spirit of that was.
Vaness Henry: 45:39
Let me interview you Kardashian style and just see what we're doing. It's just so funny. I've been thinking of doing a reprising this, so I think like I don't even want to tell you the manifestation list of like the the roll call script I have written to send out.
Teresa Brenneman: 45:53
Yeah no, I just I loved it. I thought it was so unique and so cool and, like I'm a reality TV junkie. And so I've. I always am trying to figure out people's designs, watching it and just wanting to see people's designs.
Vaness Henry: 46:05
Exactly Cause I was not actually a TV person Like I wasn't, you know. And then what got me into it is shows like the Kardashians and people are like I hate the Kardashians.
Vaness Henry: 46:15
I'm like you're missing the point. Like they're such an example of their design, like it's fascinating to me to watch the six lines through there, what they're doing, the traumas coming out. Like Kim Kardashian's design is fascinating, so it makes Kanye's design fascinating. Like it makes the whole orbit of people Like I don't know, you're just more gentle with, with celebrities who endure the fame, trauma that we can't relate to because they lose their humanity.
Vaness Henry: 46:42
And so that is like if this was in the time of Cleopatra, you know they would be our gods, they would be our, our royalty, because they're the ones in the most public eye.
Vaness Henry: 46:51
Yeah, right, like that's what it is. And so I think I just have compassion for cause you, I just feel like we're witnessing them be so traumatized, a hundred percent, yeah, and and and the way people are like the blind and like come at them, I'm like you guys don't even see that. Like we've done this to them, like we're the ones attacking their faces and like yeah, like you know it's, yeah, it's wild to me. So I think I feel a lot of compassion, for this is not so gross. Celebrities, because people are like I don't feel bad for celebrities or rich people. I'm like no, because I don't feel bad for those things, but there is something that we don't relate to that I find sad that we don't care to even bother, and it just makes me contemplate, like larger theories of God, like what, what we don't care to. They're almost like we don't care to see the holiness in everyone, regardless of their status or skin color gender.
Teresa Brenneman: 47:46
you know, I'm with you on that one. I they're almost like zoo animals. It's like they have everything they need, I feel terrible for zoo animals.
Vaness Henry: 47:55
I cannot go to the zoo. That's a great example.
Teresa Brenneman: 47:58
You're in a cage, yes, and they have everything they need. There's no immediate threats Because I think, we think, about that with celebrities that they have everything they need. They're taken care of. They don't have to be out there grinding like this, but they grind in a different way. And they do, and I don't think anybody is meant, truly meant, to have that many eyeballs on them, like in just terms of our biology. I completely agree.
Teresa Brenneman: 48:21
We're not designed to, and so we're fucking around and finding out what happens when you put this many eyeballs on somebody, joe.
Vaness Henry: 48:28
Biden, just getting diagnosed with prostate cancer, I was like that root's going to be undefined. You know it died of the pressure. It's undefined.
Teresa Brenneman: 48:35
You know what's really interesting too he's lost two children. Oh yeah, oh yeah, through a German medicine lens. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah.
Vaness Henry: 48:42
Child lost about German medicine. But yeah, like like that, that's interesting to me. Like what Not? Not that you like? Obviously that's interesting to me. Like what not, not that you like? Obviously that's horrible. But what do we not understand there? What's going on?
Teresa Brenneman: 48:58
there and I heard that like something. Maybe the cancer is in his bones, which?
Vaness Henry: 49:02
is a super aggression.
Teresa Brenneman: 49:04
Yeah, it's self devaluation if it's in the bones, and think about all of that he's endured, you know, over the last four years of being president. I don't think and continues to endure even that he's endured, you know, over the last four years of being president, I don't think, and continues to endure, even though he's not president it's still said about him.
Vaness Henry: 49:18
You know he's not even in that role now, and it's still the yeah, right, I think he's a four, six, right, I think he is yeah he's a four, six, yeah, yeah, wild times, man, but I'm with you on the like.
Teresa Brenneman: 49:30
It's like you almost feel bad to having empathy, for I have empathy. I could see I can have empathy for almost anybody.
Vaness Henry: 49:37
I'm saying this in this way because I know it could be perceived that people are like you feel bad for a celebrity. Do not mishear me. There are some people, like Teresa, who are so dialed in and plugged into the atmospheres that we can't see. They do feel for celebrities. They do feel for pets, creatures, land and, like you said, I cry a lot. I cry a lot. Well, I echo what you said. I don't think any of us are meant to have such a profound collective gaze upon us because I think it will burn a hole in us. I don't think that we're our fabric of our aura is equipped to endure that they're sacrificing their souls is what it feels like.
Teresa Brenneman: 50:14
Like yes, they're getting riches.
Vaness Henry: 50:15
Well, they're sacrificing their humanity because you become dehumanized. When you are up in that level, we think you can't have any human problems now, but we're learning. But they can have other problems, yep.
Teresa Brenneman: 50:26
Yep, you know, and they still do have human problems. I mean, they're still they're still in these meat suits, just like we are.
Vaness Henry: 50:38
You know they're just not struggling at the. You know the level of material that a lot of folks are. But but even is that absolutely true? Like I, I really love the drag community and there was just a drag queen who recently passed away, jiggly Caliente, and lost her leg. First it was like what is going on, and then a few days later passed away. I was like Whoa, what's tragic.
Vaness Henry: 50:54
This is a person who is who's, who maybe comes from trauma, but also has access to, you know, certain supports and certain even material wealth, and it's kind of like we think they don't have humanity, but also they're still in a skin suit, like they are still human, they're still mortal, they still have the limitations of the human form, that, not that they're limitations, but they just they're equipped with that equipment, you know, but they're not treated the same, and so I think it's very interesting, when they do get ill, to just kind of think about it through this. Like you know, you have a light or a magnifying glass on you, for this time that is, maybe it's not supposed to be there. As somebody who's had equipment on me, shining on me, it has affected me. I could only imagine that the formless equipment we look at each other with would have a similar effect. Yeah, totally agree.
Vaness Henry: 51:45
Okay, but we, we, we dipped into German new medicine, so okay. So we know you love tarot, we know you love German new medicine, we know you love human design Are there any? And you're a shores person, so this is very natural for you to understand the world, the environment around you, with all these lenses, is there anything else in your brain?
Teresa Brenneman: 52:03
I mean, I also do somatic parts work, so that's something that I look at the lens through.
Vaness Henry: 52:09
Thank, you for bringing that up. That's hugely your angle in the new school of human design Very much so. Yeah, yes, school of human design.
Teresa Brenneman: 52:16
So so can? Yeah, can we talk about that for a minute? Yeah, so I got into partswork. I want to say, um, in 2018, maybe I actually went to a teal Swan retreat. I know she gets a lot of shit, but I mean.
Vaness Henry: 52:27
I, I, just I, I.
Teresa Brenneman: 52:27
She gets a lot of shit but I mean, I, I just I, I agree with a lot of the reflects about her. She's a reflector, I know, and then we also have really close. Uh, she's across of eden, I think. She was born a couple days after me different year. She's a cult survivor what are we?
Vaness Henry: 52:43
what are we expecting her to be like? I'm so over critiquing each other.
Teresa Brenneman: 52:47
I know this is the point for me, like I've gone back and forth, I like because I did experience some of that like behavior that was questionable.
Teresa Brenneman: 52:54
I watched it in person. But at the same time I really I try to just like see her medicine for what it is and I try to look at the value that I got from her as a teacher. And one of the things that she really imparted on me was parts work and at the retreat that I went to we practiced it with each other. We learned it. I was hooked and I said this is the missing piece. This is everybody needs to be looking through this lens and I actually worked with this man who had been teaching and doing it as like an executive coach for like 20 years. So he's like this older British guy, really great guy, and I learned from him and I just fell in love with the work and it really just created so much compassion.
Vaness Henry: 53:33
It's the missing embodiment piece, right, yeah, yeah. You see so many practitioners who like work with human design. That's the kind of the spirit at plane, that's the mental plane. That's like we're going to wrap your consciousness around these concepts, but then you've got to anchor it in the body and so, you do see, everybody starts to like you can use anything, everything works.
Teresa Brenneman: 53:51
Some people will do somatic.
Vaness Henry: 53:53
Some people will be really into, let's say, things like yoga or Pilates or you know or they'll be all about their talk, therapy or yeah, and I think that's a really needed component, but I didn't realize you were doing it since pre some of the human design stuff that I was aware about you.
Teresa Brenneman: 54:06
Yeah, yeah, I mean I want to say I found all this stuff around the same time.
Vaness Henry: 54:09
Like I had kind of.
Teresa Brenneman: 54:11
I entered into my human design experiment.
Vaness Henry: 54:12
You had the.
Teresa Brenneman: 54:13
Saturn return right.
Vaness Henry: 54:14
And so then it was like, yeah, saturn return.
Teresa Brenneman: 54:16
That's when I shifted careers from personal trainer to coach and that's when things really started Like all these systems kind of started like landing for me and integrating and I started working with them actively and that's, you know, even with the people that I would say, parts work is just so effective for people that are super mental because it allows us I don't know what that is. What is parts work? If I've never heard this before?
Vaness Henry: 54:39
what is that?
Teresa Brenneman: 54:40
yeah. So parts work is. I mean it's also called like voice dialogue. There's different kind of schools of thought around it, different ways to go about it. Internal family systems is a form of parts work.
Teresa Brenneman: 54:49
It's like basically the way that I do it is, first of all we meet these different aspects of your consciousness. So usually I start with the protector part. We all have a protector that developed as we were children to keep us safe. It's like as soon as we kind of realized that we could meet adversity in the world or that the world was an unsafe place, we developed a protector part. So our protector protects us in the ways that worked as a child to protect it. And the protector is kind of like the manager. It like manages the other parts. It decides who's safe to come out, who it needs to employ. You know that kind of thing. So I really like to start with the protector, get to know that, really flesh that out.
Teresa Brenneman: 55:26
But you basically interview these different parts of yourself. So I kind of coach people to go through a little process to evoke that part of themselves. And you talk in third person. So if I was in a part of me, I would be referring to myself as Teresa, and then they call it different things. I call it the central self, but like, teresa is the central self, so I like to imagine myself as just like in the center, watching all of these parts coexist. Another good exercise is to imagine that you're a house and everybody has their own room and like I'm in the living room, just kind of inviting different parts out of the rooms, and you'd be so surprised at the things that come out of people's mouths when they start channeling this energy. These parts have their own names, they have different genders, they have just a different it could be an animal.
Vaness Henry: 56:14
Yes, let's jump in, let's jump into shamanism. Yes, some people would say it's very shamanic.
Vaness Henry: 56:21
You are discovering your spiritual team. You know, in some places we might call this a spirit guide and some places we might call it you could. You know what, it doesn't matter, you could call it whatever, but there are. It's the idea of there are characters or entities or energies that are within and around you and they can be there. Everything is basically an aspect of self, but sometimes you might have someone come in who's an ancestor or somebody who is a fictional character, or a creature, or an angel or an alien it could be absolutely anything. And they are there with, for they're like an undiluted perspective, Like they're one specific angle. They're here to help you with whatever we're doing here, or and and you know, actually I, I love what you began with the protector I've done some myth mending with fellow shores person, Tao Montoya.
Teresa Brenneman: 57:09
Oh yeah.
Vaness Henry: 57:11
He's so great, he's also off. He's often I know another good one and and yeah, I can't say enough for his his teaching and he too helped me identify that protector or the hypercritical inner voice, and was very his. His work was very supportive. It sounded very reminiscent of what you're describing. Yeah, that character is not evil. They are not. There's no rotten part of you, but perhaps we they. We have no more use for what they're protecting.
Teresa Brenneman: 57:39
We can reassign. I like to say we like to employ them into a different position.
Vaness Henry: 57:43
It's like and you.
Teresa Brenneman: 57:45
You know, when they're talking to these, you end up discovering why they feel so strongly about their role and also a lot of them are tired of being in that role. If it's been like I've been this role for her or I've not, I've been.
Vaness Henry: 57:57
I've been ignored not looked at. I've been here festering inside, and she hates me even though.
Teresa Brenneman: 58:02
I'm protecting her and I'm doing all I can to keep her safe.
Teresa Brenneman: 58:04
And then it's like, well, what if? Like a lot of times, the shift that I see and this isn't always the case, but this is a really common thing the protector ends up really liking being called the advocate at some point and it's like, oh yeah, oh yeah, girl rebrand. Yes, it's like, okay, um, like Teresa can handle her shit, she can protect herself, but you're a really strong advocate for her and she does need an advocate. And like, how can we help that strong, passionate, protective, fierce part of you come into that role? And then also, how can we employ these different aspects of consciousness at different times consciously, and we're not always going to be conscious about it, but when you know these different parts of you exist and this is some of my favorite work to do with clients, especially when we're doing follow-up work is like, okay, so we met your people, pleaser, the other day and we kind of reemployed them into this role of like a PR person for you.
Teresa Brenneman: 58:55
And now they're like you're kind of public representative to keep the peace.
Vaness Henry: 58:58
They're your champion.
Teresa Brenneman: 58:59
They're your champion and like how is that working for you? And it's always really interesting to hear how people can now consciously bring in that part and be like you know what? I really brought her in and channeled her energy and like it created I got a promotion at work or whatever and I'm like cool, yeah, it's like these parts of you are brilliant and we end up not liking them because they do create issues when we're, when they're like subconsciously driving the bus, and when they don't know what their role is, and when you're kind of bothered by them and you're like, oh, like you're so annoying. It's like they feel like well, I don't have a role, so what do you want me to do? You know?
Vaness Henry: 59:35
And that's an internal confusion that I think huge, think huge, I think. Don't know no truth to this, but I think that is a perfect description of the inner confusion and chaos that we can experience in our inner world, which affects ourselves, affects our development and can metastasize into things like cysts, into things like tumors, into things that don't belong in the body, because all cancer is is a deeply confused cell, because it grew from inside me, so I'm not going to attack it, and yet there's. It's trying to be something, it's not. It's filling a space, space that's not supposed to be there. So how does that happen? And part of my work in studies is okay. Well, let's look at the invisible relationship dynamics that we're in in our life.
Vaness Henry: 1:00:19
But then also, what you are really beautifully underscoring is don't forget to look at the inner dialogue and the company that you keep there, because if there is inner war and chaos there, what's the how do we want to say? That you want to lower entropy, you want to lower chaos, lower create. You know that madness, because if that's being held within your form, your body can't contain that and things will start to malfunction or grow in mutated ways that we're not actually designed to grow in.
Vaness Henry: 1:00:47
So I think parts work is way more important than we think. It's right up there in the realm of you know, and this is awareness building. Of course we're not going to be conscious all the time. It's awareness building, let's have grace for ourselves, but it's equally as important as whether you're eating nourishing material.
Teresa Brenneman: 1:01:06
A thousand percent, yeah, you know it's nourishing the foremost part of you, yeah, and you know, it's the kind of thing where, like I love that you brought up, like dis-ease and cancer and these things, because you can channel that part of you, you can channel the part of you that is the cancer. Like that it's a very I like this practice because it's very creative and it uses our imaginations Channel your sickness, oh personify it, give it a form in your body.
Teresa Brenneman: 1:01:30
Hunt it, Find it. The subconscious is so deep and how could we ever have all of that at the surface? We don't have space to have, we don't have capacity to have all of that at the surface all the time. But I look at the subconscious as like a pool that we can dive into and kind of go find what we need and if we're ready to hear it, the subconscious will present it to you. And I've seen this happen time and time again, where it's like if you are curious and you were asking your subconscious what is going on here, it will either present to you through directly coming out of your mouth or through an intuitive feeling, or in our external environment. It will get you the information that you need to know. You have to notice, you have to be quiet, you have to be curious and we have access to so much if we really truly want it.
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